Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Ok i just saw probably one of the most disturbing things in my kitchen you could ever see (aside from seeing your roommate having sex on the kitchen counter, that would be ever more disturbing). I was at my refrigerator and i noticed that the time on the microwave looked a little funny and upon further inspection i see that there is a spider IN my microwave. Not in the microwave where you can open the door smash the thing and then clean out the guts. NO! it is actually INSIDE my microwave. waving to me behind the plastic. taunting me because it knows i can't smash it. i was trying to figure out if i could actually pull of the piece of plastic that covered the back-lit time but alas i think i would actually break my microwave. so there i was absolutely helpless as this little spider sat sunning himself over my green 7:22pm. i tapped the plastic because i was not going to let that little freak sit in my appliance using it as his warm safe place. NO! i was going to disturb his restful bliss until he agreed to leave. he did indeed climb down into a little hole at the bottom of the plastic but to where i don't know, behind the number pad somewhere. now i'm going to envision this little menace sitting behind my number pad with all his little spider pals laughing at the fact that they are safe from the giant girl beyond the plastic. and how his little spidey paws are going to be walking over who knows where, with who knows what kind of germs. EEWWW! i can never use my microwave again. Oh wait! i only use that think to warm the wax i use to de-hair my legs. well by all means spider stay housed in my microwave, in fact use some of the wax drippings to free your hairy self of unwanted "spider legs" (if you are a girl you will get my joke right there and if not here is a hint: swimsuit). live your predator life in my microwave just please don't lay eggs and have more spider children i really don't think i can handle an infestation. And if you don't believe me well i have included a picture for your viewing pleasure.