It always feels like………somebody’s watching me

Last night I ran to the store around 9pm to get a few items I needed and while I was walking across the front of the store just below the checkout line there was a lady who might have shopped at the “Big and Tall” staring at me as I walked towards her. At first I thought perhaps she was just trying to read the words on my shirt but as I passed by I saw that she had this sort of blank expression which lead me to believe that perhaps mentally she wasn’t all there. I was weaving in and out of the isles trying to figure out where the items were that I needed and out of the corner of my eye I spotted my tall friend also in that same isle. She was looking at the items on the shelf and touching them as if reading them but I don’t think she was paying much attention. So isle after isle this pattern continued. I wasn’t sure what her fascination was with me or why I was the one she chose to follow around the store but I did have this edge of concern creep into the back of my mind. “What if she does something rash? What if she acts out and grabs me thinking I’m someone she knows? What if she tries to hug me and crushes my ribs?” maybe my thoughts were a little ridiculous but I wasn’t too sure about her mental stability. For all I know she could have just escaped from the hospital mental ward down the street and had a need to find a friend. I wasn’t about to stick around and see so I quickly got into the checkout line. As I was standing there I could feel the stare from the girl’s eyes boring into the back of my head. I turned and looked over my left shoulder and there she was with her cart inches away from my leg. I didn’t want to make any sudden movements and frighten the beast to react so I adjusted my position in line to be behind the displays stacked full of magazines and gum. Trying to hide my face I placed all the items on the conveyor belt and waited several minutes before looking around again. When I looked back over the display I noticed that the behemoth had wandered off hopefully to find another friend. As I was waiting in line at the cashiers I noticed that the clerk was coughing and not showing a very enthused attitude about being at work. When it was my turn to be rung through I made the mistake of asking, “Are you sick?” “Well I thought it was just allergies but now I think I’m really sick. See I didn’t get much sleep this week and then on the weekend it was my birthday and I stayed out really late and only slept for like 4hrs and on Sunday I went to the Chargers game and it was my birthday and blah, blah, blah, blah………..” Just sort of nodding and acting interested, “Oh, yeah? Wow? Really?” I was busy scanning the store to make sure I wasn’t going to be followed out. The cashier with her left eye pointed at the wall and me not knowing when she was asking me a direct question because her stare didn’t really indicate if she was looking at me or the display behind me I noticed that she didn’t really care to bag my items. Maybe it was because she couldn’t see that there wasn’t a bagger at the end of her line because her one eye was apparently searching space for satellites. I grabbed my items while simultaneously signing my receipt and darted out the door trying to get out of the freak show grocery store. I made quick pace to my car and threw my stuff in the back seat. When I turned around I almost ran into the 2 story tower of woman that had apparently noticed my exit from the store. “Ok, well I’m going to get in my car now.” “Where are you going Angie? I thought we were friends?” “Well my name’s not Angie and I need to get home now so if you could just step over I’d like to open my door.” She didn’t step over so I started to back up and distance myself from her, after a few paces backwards I didn’t notice the curb for the planter and fell backwards. “C’mon Angie. Let’s go to the park?” Not really wanting to go anywhere with this giant girl, I started grabbing to find a firm hold to push myself up and get up to run. But before I knew it the girl bent forward and grabbed my foot, “Let’s go. Let’s go play at the park.” With every plea she was pulling my leg...........................................just like I’m pulling yours. HA HA! Had you going there for a second didn’t I? Ok with the exception of the incident at the car everything else is true. Apparently after a certain hour the grocery store turns into Ripley’s believe it or not. Guess I’ll keep my shopping hours to daylight. Aaawwwwwooooo! (that’s the howling at the moon I heard on my way home)